In the hospital, I got zero sleep. I seriously think I slept a total of 5 hours from Monday night to Saturday. It was awful. It was mostly the interruptions from the nurses checking on either me, Ella or Bria. It was constant. I would have just got both girls down for bed or a nap and in would walk the nurse to check their vitals, etc. Then, there was trying to breastfeed which may have been the most frustrating experience of my life.
I fully intended on breastfeeding. Bria was doing great! She was getting colostrum and she is the main reason my milk came in! She would nurse for 20 minutes or so and would fall asleep, if I would try to remove her- she would act like she wasn't done. Then, she would want to eat only an hour later.
Ella was not cut out for breastfeeding. Not only were they preemies, Ella weighed 4lbs 13 ounces. I worked days with a lactation consultant, full well knowing my little girl wasn't getting enough to eat. Little by little they both lost weight. Which earned us an extra few days at the hospital.
I kept asking, crying, was I doing enough? Do I need to supplement? No, they kept saying- you are doing everything right. You're doing a great job, blah blah. Those words kept my mind at ease until the next feeding when Bria would get hungry almost immediately after a feed and I could barely get Ella to latch on let alone to eat more than 5 minutes before falling asleep. I cried just about every few hours. Finally on our last day at the hospital, the pediatrician and lactation consultant agreed to let me supplement formula.
I didn't want to supplement. I planned on exclusively breastfeeding but when you watch the two babies you created and are now responsible for- they fully depend on only you for their nutrition- you change your mind pretty quickly.
We were given Similac neosure, I was told to let them nurse 20-25 minutes at the breast then offer 1-2oz of formula. Well that didn't work- our whole problem is the girls falling asleep while nursing so there was no way they were going to take a bottle after they were asleep. That lasted one day. Sunday I woke up and let them feed, as I had done all night. I still felt engorged and insanely uncomfortable. So- I pumped. I got 4 ounces after feeding! It hit me- those girls weren't getting enough to eat and how on earth was I supposed to measure it and keep track? That day, I decidedto solely pump and our regular pediatrician suggested we mix the breast milk and formula together. They have been content ever since and it has most certainly helped my sanity. I can monitor how much they each get and Andrew can help feed as well. I am getting a nice supply built up in the freezer. At first I was pumping every 2 hours and getting maybe 1 ounce each breast. I decides to pump 3-4 times a day (may increase to 4-5) and I am now consistently getting 30-32 ounces a day, still not enough to feed them breast milk only but at the moment they still need to supplement formula as well to continue to gain weight.
Ella:
Birth: 4lbs 13 ounces
At one point in the hospital was 4lbs 5 ounces.
At discharge: 4lbs 7/8 ounces
Next day appointment: 4lbs 9 ounces
1st Peds Appt: 4lbs 11.5 ounces!
2nd Peds Appt (one week later): 5 lbs 2 ounces!!!!!!
Bria:
Birth: 6lbs 10.5 ounces
At one point in hospital: 6lbs 4 ounces
At discharge: 6lbs 6 ounces
Next day appointment: 6lbs 7 ounces
1st Peds Appt: 6lbs 8.5 ounces
2nd Peds Appt (one week later): 6lbs 11.5 ounces
We now have to watch her closely. She has to return next week- Wednesday due to holiday and a funeral to check he weight. To me, she's filling out and I think the girls are going through a major growth spurt because they are eating fools! I think every hour to hour and mahal we are feeding them something, mix or breast milk only.
I am so thankful I decided to pump. I was stressed, cried constantly, sore and frustrated. I know the lactation consultant and pediatrician were hoping for exclusive breast fed babies, as was I. But- the health and satisfaction of our little ones are way more important than my pride or expectations. We will now invest stock in similac (as I truly hope to be able to give them breast milk only one day- they are eating machines... I don't know if my body can keep up).
I did however buy fenugreek, it's hard to remember to take it three times a day but I started it a few days ago and hope it starts to make a difference!
Love my morning pumps! 6am!
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